Five Minute Observations

Tag: Humor

  • Flagged

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in ,

    “If I think it’s spam, it’s spam. That’s how democracy works. Majority of one.” Sometimes office life makes you petty. Sometimes you act on it.

  • Truth Is Always Stranger than Fiction

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in

    A late-night traffic stop becomes a reminder: storytelling connects us, grounds us, and makes us known. In a world of strangers, our stories are how we find our way home.

  • Senior Skip Day

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in

    High school is where teenagers get to learn what life is like. You’ve got all the makings of a John Hughes movie. Every cliché. All the stereotypes. Kids who enjoy smoking marijuana. Bookworms, nerds, and geeks who love playing Dungeons and Dragons, video games, and reading about fantasy worlds, the likes of which J.R.R. Tolkien…

  • Conspiracy Theory #381: Cheetos Trucks

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in

    I’ve said it before, so let me repeat myself. I am NOT a conspiracy theorist. But if I were, how would I explain how I’ve seen more than eight Cheetos trucks driving north on I-55. My first thought was I’m imagining this. If that were true, how would you explain me driving south I-55 when…

  • “My truck’s gone.”

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in

    “What do you mean?” His tone was less than friendly, which was saying something. He chewed on the end of an unlit cigar. “You are telling me someone got away with your truck?” Snapping his fingers, “Just like that? Please, for the love of all that is holy, tell me you are kidding?” “Um, yeah.…

  • Tony – The Tow Truck Driver

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in

    “Tony, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you, you can’t come in here dressed like that,” Margie said, a cigarette hanging from her lipstick-painted red lips. In her right hand, she held a carafe of burned black coffee. In the other, a breakfast plate: three pancakes, two pieces of thick linked…

  • Andy’s Close Call

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in ,

    High school. Acid-washed jeans. Polo shirts, more specifically, Ralph Loren. Bright, loud colors. Mini-skirts. Teased-out hair, if long enough, coated with enough Aquanet to freeze it permanently in place. Jelly shoes, no socks. The Don Johnson Miami Vice look. And more than enough drama to write four seasons of Saved By the Bell or 90210.…

  • Choices

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in

    The author reflects on the choices and behaviors of drivers and the impact of selfishness and impatience on road safety.

  • Moving Day

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in

    Empty. Empty and quiet. I hated it. Then again, I was just a kid who absolutely hated quiet! I loved being around people, all kinds of people. The older the people, the better. At eight, adults were way more interesting than kids my own age. But right now, it was just our family. Me. Dad.…

  • Pearls? Meet Blink-182

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    by

    Joe Class III
    in

    “Wait, what was that?” Pulling out the earbuds, Gina looked over her shoulder where the sound came from. “Can you please move?” The woman was wearing sunglasses inside, which was the first thing Gina noticed. Second were the extravagant pearls hanging from her neck. Gina saw lots of women wearing pearls in southern California. But…