He told me the truth yesterday. And it shocked the heck out of me.

“You know I’m using if I’m trying to defend myself and my behavior. If I’m being honest, the more argumentative I am, the more I’ve been using.”

I’ve known this participant for a while and seen him at what I thought was his best and worst. Court ordered sobriety and he’s fought it every step of the way. Now, he’s in too deep. Go to prison and serve time or complete drug and alcohol rehabilitation.

“Tough call there, bud,” I said to him. “You made the right call. Rehab gives you more freedom. More flexibility.”

“Yeah. Like being able to smoke.”

Maybe this time he’ll get through whatever is holding him back from letting go of his addiction.

I hope so.

I have zero expectations for him, or any other participant. Their journey isn’t mine. I have one job: stay. Show up. And risk it all, which, in this case means be honest with him. Help him see what showing up looks like.

Showing up isn’t clicking on a link or finishing an institutional program. It means be there. Get to know someone else. Share your story. Be a part of theirs.

Do that and you just might learn something you didn’t know before.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​